Testimony Tee and the Valley of Decision: The Watch Letter
My sister, Apostle Tee, over the last year and half has endured great loss, great pain, great disappointment, and great let downs. She has faced more in this time period than some people experience in a lifetime.
What she faced, for some, would have been enough reason to turn their back on God and walk away. But yet she stands. She stands because when she felt like giving up, she repented, she cleared her heart and she stood on the testimonies of what God has already done in her life. In fact, last night she delivered a word during service that dealt a mighty blow to the kingdom of Satan and instead shown the light of the Kingdom of God.
Her nickname is Testimony Tee because she is transparent and she is tenacious and she has never failed to get up and testify about what God has done and how he has delivered. She stands up every service with a testimony no matter what, even sharing when she felt she let God down, and sharing how she repented and recovered.
Our Pastor Chief Apostle H.C. Gunn has always taught me to never sit down on your testimony. He said: stand up and tell it. When you stand up and testify and lift your hands in praise, he said, it knocks the devil off of your lap and it strengthens you and others.
I believe that because of Apostle Tee’s willingness to stand up and testify no matter her circumstances she became too slippery for the devil to grab hold on to and she developed an internal strength and faith in God that she didn’t knew she had that rose up right on time in each of her situations that shielded her from making the wrong decision and turning her back on God in the Valley of Decision. She was able to to do this because of the great teaching we receive from our pastor and father. A great preacher doesn't just share the word, he shares life tools with his flock to help them navigate life. How to pray and turn over things to God is what our pastor teaches us weekly and they are the weapons that helped Apostle Tee fight the devil's attempt to get her to become bitter from her pain and leave God. But not so!
In the message she preached last night, she asked: “What will you do in the Valley of Decision?” That place is the place where you are at a crossroad, where you choose to do what your flesh wants and self wants and deny the Lord or you choose to surrender your desires and will to the Lord and follow him and obey him at all costs.
She talked about Judas and Peter. But not in the typical way. She talked about how Judas denied Jesus and betrayed him with his decisions, in his heart, thoughts and actions. She noted how the word said Judas REPENTED OF HIMSELF. He did not mean it. There is a difference between feeling guilty and being repentant. Feeling guilty is feeling sorry for yourself. Repentance is being sincerely sorry to the Lord for your sin against him. Judas just felt sorry for himself. If he truly repented his story would not have ended where it did. Jesus openly warned of Judas' betrayal, so he had a chance to change his mind. But his mind was made up. It is wrong for us to choose to sin on purpose and then plan to repent later. That plan and often our plans in general destroy sincerity. And sincerity is needed for God to accept our repentance.
On the other hand, Peter also was warned before he denied and betrayed Jesus. Yes, he sinned and Jesus even saw with his own eyes the moment Peter betrayed him, but what was different about Peter is that he did not set out to deny Jesus on purpose, he was weak and immature, high-minded and did not let the warning humble him. But he did not have guile in his heart like Judas. So, after Peter came to himself he DID NOT REPENT TO HIMSELF or just to stop feeling guilty, but he repented unto the Lord and he was restored by Jesus himself. And after that Peter journeyed on and we continued to learn about his work for the Lord throughout the Bible. Peter did not let sin end his story and you don’t have to either!
Something Apostle Tee said in her message that was so profound: When you are sorry you go the person or back to the place of offense and get things clear. You don’t keep your repentance a secret or repent just in your mind. Judas tried to give the money back that he took in exchange for betraying Jesus but he could have instead ran to Jesus and asked for forgiveness. Peter and Jesus talked about his sin and dealt with it man to man. There is a difference. This is a good place to note the importance of staying connected to your leader. Even when you fail, stay connected ... it will help you recover faster and stronger. If you truly want to walk with God, you will also want to walk with your leader. Peter wanted to stay in God, and he knew that meant also staying with his leader.
A valley is a low place. But depending on your willingness to change you can either stay in that low place or you can repent and use the valley to get to the mountain and climb your way up to repentance and back to the Lord.
One way to ensure there are no weights holding you down, so you can’t climb out of your valley of your decision, is to speak up (be transparent like Chief told me one day), testify, tell on yourself to the Lord and then confess to your pastor and sometimes you may need to confess to the saints. Your pastor can help you know what to say openly and not. And be like Apostle Testimony Tee and testify of God’s grace and goodness no matter the happenings in your life. When you can do these things you can be so wet with the washing of salvation and the dew of the Holy Spirit that the devil, sin, and his demons just slip and slide right off your life and you can be so light as a feather that nothing can keep you down.
I am proud of you Apostle Tee, as well as Apostle Keta, Apostle Peterson and Apostle D’andrea, Apostle Red, and all of the others who have or will bring the word from God to the body while our leader and his companion are on the field for the work of the Kingdom. And that is the way it should be. Are you one that can be called on to serve and share the word? Have you cleared your heart and made the decision to turn to God and away from yourself, so he can use you like he did Peter. Don’t become a fossil like Judas become fuel like Peter. To my leader and his great wife, I am proud of you both for your life of sincerity towarLDS God. Thank you for being such a powerful example to us all as you don't talk the walk, you walk the walk.
I love you all and I am praying for us all. I am going to take heed to this word so that God can find me choosing him in the Valley of Decision. What will we do with your test? And will it become your testimony or your spiritual obituary?
Please continue to pray for Chief Apostle Gunn and Apostle Felicia and the ministry of the Body of Christ, Inc.
Please excuse any typos. I am traveling and on the move.
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