Would You Rather? The Watch Letter

Silver and gold

Silver and gold

I'd rather have Jesus than silver and gold

No fame or fortune

Nor riches untold

I'd rather have Jesus than silver and gold

Don't give me a mansion

On top of the hill

Don't give me the world

With a shallow thrill

But just give me a savior

My life He can hold

I'd rather have Jesus than silver and gold

This song is one of the most popular songs in gospel music. Many sing it. Many say it is their testimony.

But how many mean it?

This is a question I have to ask myself first.

The key words that keep standing out to me in this song are: "I'd rather have Jesus."

So, I am asking myself today: Is Jesus my first and only preference?

• Would I choose him over everything and everyone else?

• Would I choose him over pain, over heartache?

• Would I choose him over my plans, my goals, or over a promotion at my job?

• Would I walk away from all that I have or have access to if he asked me to?

• Would I choose him over my marriage or choose him over having the love and affection of my bloodline family?

• Would I choose him over a new home, new vehicle, etc.?

At the moment, it is easy to answer "yes." But what our Pastor, Chief Apostle H.C. Gunn -- a great crusader for the Lord -- is teaching us is: that we have to ensure our answer is "yes" no matter the circumstances or the sentiment of the moment.

No matter how we feel, no matter what time of day it is, no matter who we are around, no matter what we may lose or gain -- our answer must never change. And the only way that is possible is to love God as our first and only true love.

For me, the words "I'd rather have Jesus" mean we are choosing him out of the desire and depth of our hearts, and we are not just saying it in vain because we think it makes us look holy or we will get into Heaven. But because we sincerely and desperately love him and delight in him; and he is the light and apple of our eye.

It is easy to look at the terms silver and gold just as financial wealth and to say, "no" I am not a selfish person or "no" I don't want money more than God, but silver and gold are also shiny things.

We have to search ourselves to see what shiny thing will make us leave the Lord out of our lives or certain areas of our lives. Sometimes it's the desire to have friends or be popular that is the shiny thing. Sometimes it's the desire to receive accolades and achievements. Sometimes it's a desire to reach a high status in the church or sometimes it's a desire to be known as the most respected, most intelligent, or most skillful. Sometimes it's a desire to be loved by someone so much that you would deny Jesus just to be with them. Sometimes it's the desire to live in and be like the world in secret but appear to be a good or reasonable person to others in public. All of these things are lukewarmness. Chief Apostle Gunn taught us that lukewarmness is what is spiritually killing us and is what will keep us out of the Kingdom, and keeps us separated from the Lord.

After coming back from a very long work trip, I felt that I had let myself get so drained and consumed that I was out of tune with God; and the song that came to my heart when I got back from my flight was "Silver and Gold." Meeting work requirements or the requirements of your boss is not worth it if they cause you to be spiritually distracted and distant. Making someone else proud of you or being proud of yourself is not worth it, if it causes you to be separated from God.

When I got home from the trip and listened to some of the messages I missed, and when I came through the doors of the church, I found that my pastor was ministering that same song God put on my heart. God knows what he is doing and how to recover us.

During the messages, Chief Apostle Gunn was also teaching on how we do things and say they are for God and think they count, but they don't count if we are not doing them in faith, which is complete trust and confidence in him. To have complete trust and confidence in someone, you have to love them sincerely, and love is a choice.

He also taught us that true love waits. We have to be willing to wait on God and fast unto him. We have to be willing to be still and be patient with a desire to hear him and be filled by his spirit daily. Too often, we are transactional with Him. We drop a prayer, and a few praises, and if we think we've got an answer or a blessing, we move on from Him and to the next thing. But how would we feel if our spouse or loved one treated us in that same transactional way?

Just like we would expect of a companion who doesn't demonstrate their love enough to us, God is requiring more of us. Chief Apostle Gunn reminded us of this during a recent message. God doesn't want our leftovers, he wants the best love we can offer him, and he wants us to love him more and more each day ... just as we would expect someone to do for us.

In service on Friday, he asked us what have we sincerely done for God today. Sometimes, when we do pray, give, fast, or help we aren't doing it for God, we are doing it to feel better about ourselves or to look a certain way or just to go through the motions/traditions. So, when was the last time we sincerely did something just for God, just because we loved him?

When we think about Judas --- the disciple who betrayed Jesus--- it is easy to say he betrayed Jesus just for the silver. But a desire for silver is just the surface. Maybe he had a low self-esteem and was seeking to do something that would make him stand out from the others. Maybe he wanted to be well-known among the government leaders or the community. Maybe he wanted to impress a woman or buy new land. We may never know what drove Judas to do what he did, but we can check ourselves and seek God to find out what is in our hearts, minds, and imaginations that would cause us to abandon him. Maybe Judas thought he loved Jesus but what the devil was offering was something he loved more.

Chief Apostle Gunn taught us that there are oppressive demons and decisions in our flesh that guide us to do things that are in enmity with God. We have to evict them. It is time we dig deep and get to the root or else we will never be able to truly say we'd rather have Jesus.

As I was writing this, in the background, a movie was playing. A man was in a battle for his life and as he lay in the hospital, he started to negotiate with the Lord. He told him: I will go to church, I will pray, I will give, I will do this and that. And as he was negotiating, a woman came into the room and told him, it doesn't work like that. Jesus doesn't want to negotiate with you. He doesn't want us to serve him to get what we want. He wants us to have a relationship with him. He wants us to pray because we want to talk to him and learn from him. He wants us to give because we want to do something for him or others on his behalf. He wants us to be active in church because we want to fellowship with him and his people.

In other words, he wants us to have "a rather" in our hearts --- that above all else we choose him. As the man in the movie stayed in the hospital, he learned to stop making demands and negotiations with God, but instead, he started talking with God and became so content in his relationship with God that his recovery was just the icing on the cake.

What if the Lord decides that he is no longer providing monetary or physical blessings? Would he still be our choice? What if God asked us to leave everyone we knew and all that we had? Would he still be our choice? I will close this blog out with another part of the song "Silver and Gold" and by praying this: Lord, I choose you again, and wherever I never really chose you in the first place, I choose you now.

… In the midnight hour when my body is rocking with pain

I'd rather have Jesus (I'd rather have Jesus), I'd rather have Jesus

The Son of Man, the King of kings

I'd rather have Jesus (than silver) than silver and gold

… I'd rather have Jesus, I don't need a fancy car

I don't even have to have a diamond ring

Hey, but give me Jesus in the midnight hour

When all of my money is gone

… I can call on Jesus, hey

And I know He'll answer, I know He'll answer

He's the only One that can save your soul

He can make you whole, He can be there for you

Oh, hey, I'd rather have Jesus, I'd rather have Jesus

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